Couple earns $270,000 a year, but doesn’t feel like it’s enough: ‘Money is the scariest thing to me’

On paper, it looks like married couple Anushka, 31, and Fernando, 30, have hit it off.

The couple, both Sri Lankan immigrants, each earn $135,000 a year and live quite comfortably in San Diego, they recently told Ram Sethi on his “I’ll Teach You to Be Rich” podcast. Their last names were not used.

They have no debt, $253,000 invested for retirement and $100,000 in cash savings. But they still feel constantly stressed and often end up arguing about money.

“Money is the scariest thing to me,” Fernando said on the podcast.

Seth told them their mindful spending plan — Seth’s budget template that his guests fill out to show where their money goes each month — is one of the best he’s seen on his show . By Seth’s standards, they’re not spending much on housing. They are also saving enough for short-term and long-term goals and are not burdened with debt payments, according to Seth.

So what’s the problem?

“We know it’s not the numbers. It’s something else,” Sethi said.

Anushka and Fernando’s complicated relationship with money affects what they do with their paychecks and how they feel about their overall financial situation.

Unlike many couples who come on Sethi’s show, Anushka and Fernando don’t have a debt problem – no debt at all. And their fixed costs, including rent, transportation and groceries, are within Seth’s recommended range of 50% to 60% of their monthly income.Â

But the couple still disagree about where their money goes. Anushka, who mainly handles the couple’s financial planning, wants to invest aggressively for the future. Fernando is not so sure.

“We spend a lot of money saving, and just based on my experience, that money can evaporate,” Fernando said.

The couple puts about 15% of their combined monthly income toward savings for emergencies, vacations, and a home. They invest an additional 22% in their retirement and brokerage accounts.

Fernando said they are hiding a lot of money for some reason. First, he is skeptical of investing and considers it as risky as gambling. Second, he is pessimistic about the future in general, not expecting to live long enough to need or even want a well-funded retirement. He also feels restricted when Anushka wants them to cut back on things like dining out to meet their ambitious savings and investment goals.

Unlike her husband, Anushka is concerned about having enough money in the future, so they can stop working if they have to or want to.

“If the two of you can’t come to a shared vision for money — including investments, savings, spending, family, the big things — you’ll be perpetuating the pattern you currently have,” Sethi told them.

Anushka and Fernando are distrustful when it comes to money, but not when it comes to trusting each other. Fernando doesn’t trust the stock market or even his savings because he knows how quickly money can disappear in the event of an economic downturn or personal crisis. Anushka doesn’t have much faith that the couple will ever have enough money to feel secure

To Seth, both of these positions are just stories they’re telling themselves, which aren’t based on real evidence. “As humans, we love our stories, and stories gain evidence almost every day,” he said.

Although it is possible that the stock market may crash or an emergency may wipe out their savings, Anushka and Fernando have prepared as best they can.Â

These stories are costing the couple, Sethi said. Fernando’s reluctance to invest has cost him valuable profits, while Anushka’s money anxiety has cost the couple valuable experiences and comforts they can realistically afford.

Crunching their numbers and talking about their past experiences and feelings helped the couple realize that there is money to meet all of their priorities, and they can make adjustments if and when those priorities change.

Sethi used a compound interest calculator to show the couple that if they continued to invest about $43,500 a year on their $250,000 principal at a 7% rate of return, they could have over $9.1 million invested by the time they are about 65 years old.

He then showed them how they could cut that annual investment in half and end up with $5.88 million in 35 years, plus thousands of extra dollars to play with every month. That might mean sending more money to help Fernando’s family or enjoying a vacation here and there.

Financially, Anushka and Fernando are setting themselves up for success in the future. But they have more room than they think to start enjoying the wealth they’ve built for themselves now, Sethi said.

“I really thought we were doing the bare minimum when it came to saving and investing, and [Sethi] showed me that it was not the truth,” said Anushka.

Watch the full episode here.

Do you want to be a successful and confident communicator?Take CNBC’s new online course Become an Effective Communicator: Master Public Speaking. We’ll teach you how to speak clearly and confidently, calm your nerves, what to say and not to say, and body language techniques to make a great first impression. Sign up today and use code EARLYBIRD for a 30% introductory discount until July 10, 2024.

Plus, sign up for CNBC Make It’s newsletter to get tips and tricks for success at work, with money and in life.